Today I was supposed to post a review, but instead I’ve decided to write about something that’s been on my mind for a while. Today I’m going to be answering the question, Is Age Just a Number?
I started blogging when I was twelve. I am now thirteen, soon to be fourteen. Compared to many people I know, I would consider myself mature for my age but sometimes age gets in the way.
I worry that people will think badly of me if I review a new adult book, or if something I say will come across immature. This isn’t like me. I don’t normally care what people think of me but when it comes to age, I worry about how people perceive me. This was never a problem before I started blogging but now I’m talking to authors, publishers, bloggers and other people who are considerably older than me and sometimes I feel the pressure of having to act older and checking my writing and tweets to see if I’m acting immature.
Whenever I read a new adult book I worry about people thinking that I’m too young to read about such subjects and I even feel this sometimes with YA. I’ll have to write another discussion soon about screening what children read because that’s a topic for another day, but I’m happy choosing what I want to read and if I’m not comfortable with something I will put it down. I know my own limits.
Sometimes I can feel looked down upon. This usually happens when people call me ‘sweetie’ or ‘love,’ especially when these people don’t call people the same age as them or older these names. I wonder if I was older would I get more page views, comments, follows. Do people really want to read stuff written by a hormonal ridden teenager over a respected and experienced adult? Probably not.
I’m limited as to what I can do. I have to rely on my parents to take me to signings and launches and other events. I could get the train but this isn’t always possible and I don’t always feel comfortable doing this. I sometimes feel awkward meeting other bloggers because, hey, do people really want to talk to some kid?
One of the problems with the Internet is that people see me from my writing. Every tweet I write, every blog post adds to that list that everybody has of everybody else in their minds. If I write something that may seem out of character, people will clock this and this could potentially lead them to thinking badly of me. If someone mistakenly takes my tone for something more serious than it is, this could lead to unnecessary drama, which I try to avoid at all costs.
I don’t want this post to feel too negative. I’m a thirteen year old that receives books from publishers, I’ve met people that I talk to daily and would consider friends and I’m extremely proud of myself. Never would I have thought that I could achieve so much at such a young age. And I’m happy. I really am happy. I love reading and writing and I love my blog. I’ve found something that I can see myself doing for a long time.
I’m different than quite a lot of people my age because I know what I want to do with my life and I’ve found something that interests me. Many people I know don’t know what they want to do when they leave school and rely on other people to entertain them. I don’t crave attention. Far from it. I make my own entertainment- reading and writing- and I know that one day I would like to work in the publishing industry giving back the things I’ve gotten out of books.
As I mentioned above, I’ve wanted to write this post for a while now. My age does restrict me and I do feel older than I actually am. Most people I know are self-conscious about their hair or their clothes, but instead I worry about my age. It’s rather funny thinking about it, but it’s true and I suppose I’ll have to face the fact that I’m not going to age years over night.
If you’re a younger blogger, do you feel this way?