I feel so sad, having to write this. It’s making me rather emotional.
You see, I usually love blogging, but lately I haven’t been able to muster up the same love that used to come naturally. Since September, really, I’ve let the blog go a bit quiet, and slowly my YouTube channel has taken first place.
I think it’s important to keep you all updated. I know I still want to blog, but the pressure has gotten too much. It’s gotten so bad that it has brought me to tears, and I don’t often cry. Combined with school, which is stressing me out to the max, and the pressure of being a teenager (more to come on that soon), I just can’t do it. To have reduced me to tears, I know it must have gotten really bad.
So what am I going to do to help this? I don’t want to give up blogging, but neither do I want to carry on like I have being doing. The thing stopping me from sitting back and taking it easy has been page views. Stupid, I know. If I don’t post regularly, these drop. Sometimes that gets me really down. I’m getting better at not checking, but it’s still disappointing and I feel like I’m putting all this effort in, and getting nothing out, when that isn’t the case at all. In fact, I think I should be proud of all I have achieved.
I’m going to first of all try to post once a week. Not four or five, like I have been doing. That one post may be a review or a discussion post, or simply just discussing something I want to. But at least I’m posting something. Some weeks there may not be a post at all, some weeks there may be quite a few. I’ m just going to see how it goes.
The other thing that is stressing me out is my review pile. It’s getting quite big, and I can’t bear to look at it. I’m going to stop requesting and accepting books, only taking one if I know I’ll read it quickly or desperately want it. Because, with homework, I don’t have time to read as much anymore, and I know this will probably get worse as time goes on. One thing I’ve missed is reading for pleasure and I’ve finally been selecting books that I’m really enjoying and can savour. It’s been so, so nice.
I don’t know what the future of Queen of Contemporary looks like. It scares me to think about, if I’m honest. It really, really frightens me. But I know I can’t go on like I have been doing, so I need to relax a bit and just enjoy myself. What’s the point in continuing doing something I don’t like doing, and find tedious? There is no point.
I hope you’ll all continue to support me. Now, more than ever, I really need you guys to help me along.
Lots of love,
Rebekah@The Reflections of a Bookworm20 January, 2014 at 8:00 pm
Lucy, you’re not alone! We all go through those kinds of periods and I can’t imagine how tough it is being a teenager on top of it (I don’t mean that to sound patronising in any way, I just can’t word it any better *face palm*) You take all of the time you need. Page views may dip but you have your loyal readers who always pop on to see what’s new so don’t worry about it. This is YOUR blog and you can run it however you like so we’ll support you any way we can. I like how I’m speaking for everybody but you know what I mean haha!
*BIG HUGS* If you ever need to chat/rant let me know 🙂
Rebekah@The Reflections of a Bookworm recently posted…RB Reviews: The Selection
Sophie (So Many Books, So Little Time)20 January, 2014 at 8:02 pm
We’ve got your back whatever you decide, Lucy. Not going anywhere! xx
Sophie (So Many Books, So Little Time) recently posted…Pawn – Aimee Carter
Ruby20 January, 2014 at 8:09 pm
Aw Lucy, I totally get you here.
Being a teenage blogger is a lot of fun and has its perks, but, naturally, it also has a lot of flaws. I mean, whilst the number of review books you receive increases, so does that endless pile of homework; even though you’ve written half a dozen reviews that day, you still have SO much revision to do; and not to mention the page views that, as they decrease, drag down your happiness and bring up your anxiety. Urgh, it’s annoying.
I’ve considered going on breaks from blogging, but I just can’t bring myself too. I’m a pretty relaxed blogger anyway, so one post a week from me is actually a pleasant surprise. Ha.
Anyway, it’s important you do what you think is best for you… and if you think taking a step back from blogging will make you happier, allow you to read the books you want to read and to concentrate on your school work then you’re definitely making the right decision. 🙂 Blogging is just a hobby and things should stay like that.
Oh and I want to be able to say “don’t let the page views get you down!” but that would make me a HUGE hypocrite. I have exactly the same problem, you see. The prospect of going one day without looking at page views is nearly impossible to comprehend. Although my page views don’t fluctuate that much, they’re hardly ever increasing and that drives me mad most of the time. :/ If I’m honest, I think we’d all be lying if we said we didn’t care about them. Of course we care… we just need to concentrate on what we’ve achieved, not what we want to achieve – because half of the time it’s pretty damn brilliant anyway. (And if it makes you feel better, your page views are probably a heck of a lot better than mine haha!)
By the way, I definitely think the decision to stop requesting books is a good one (given your situation). When I entered Year 10 I stopped requesting them all together (well, other than the Man Booker shortlist and a few odd ones I’d been anticipating) and it made things a WHOLE lot easier for me… seriously, I felt like a huge burden had been taken off me. We all started blogging for our love of books, so, naturally, it’s a relief to go back to reading only for pleasure. 🙂
Super sorry for this huge ramble Lucy, but this is just my humble input. 😉 All in all, you should do what you what with Queen of Contemporary – I’m sure we’ll all love it no matter what happens – and read what you want to read. 🙂
Ruby recently posted…Curled Up With Classics: Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
Sophie Louise20 January, 2014 at 8:11 pm
Lucy, I think we can all completely relate and understand what you’re going through! School is SO stressful at our age, and I, too, have realised I can’t accept many ARC’s any more, so aren’t. I hope you feel like you have more time too, and don’t feel any pressure to blog. We’ll always support you!
Sophie Louise recently posted…Discussion: The ‘Strong’ Heroine
Amanda @ Book Badger20 January, 2014 at 8:14 pm
You are so not alone Lucy! I’m currently going through a lot right now, and I’m having to cut back on the blog a little, and it’s strange and sad, but it’s something we have to do from time to time. Just concentrate on yourself for while, do what makes you happy, and read what you want. We all understand and are here for you Lucy! 🙂
Amanda @ Book Badger recently posted…Quick Update!
Caroline Taylor20 January, 2014 at 8:33 pm
Awh, hope you feel OK Lucy, you’ll hopefully find your love of blogging returns if you put less pressure on yourself and I agree its a good move to just get books you are really passionate about, that way you won’t find reading a chore, I can only imagine how manic your life is right now with school, homework, reading, blogging and everything else going on so make sure to take time for you. 🙂
Sabrina20 January, 2014 at 9:17 pm
Aw, Lucy, I hate to hear that you’re struggling so much!
You shouldn’t worry so much about us – we’ll always be here 😀
I’m struggling loads too at the moment. I think everyone who’s in education is, it’s a shared struggle, and I for one, support you no matter what you do. I’ve been really upset with the amount of reading/blogging I’ve done so far this year. I’ve been struggling so much with my grades, especially since I am in my final year of college and want to get into uni – I’ve had to take a step back. It shouldn’t be a chore/challenge to write posts, after all blogging is essentially a hobby!! And hobbies are supposed to be a fun break from other things – not adding more pressure!
Have you seen where you’ve taken your blog? It’s amazing what you’ve achieved and you deserve a break! (I don’t think anyone will disagree with me here)
So now, please make a cup of tea, put you’re feet up and relax.
Focus on you before anything else. I hope everything works out for you 🙂
Sabrina recently posted…College Event: A Visit From Joe Dunthorne
Rachael Reviews20 January, 2014 at 9:29 pm
I disappeared off the internet completely for 3 months when I went to uni, and that severely damaged my Youtube and blogging views/ subs/ etc, so I know what you’re talking about. In the end, you have to do what makes you happy, and sometimes real life takes priority (which sucks cos let’s face it, I would spend a lot more time on the internet if I could). Being a teen sucks for 50% of the time, and I would not have been able to do half the things your doing at your age. I was mostly just freaking out about school all the time. If you need actual stress advice, I know plenty of tricks, and remember you’re doing this because you WANT to, not because you HAVE to, so don’t feel pressurised by it.
Rachael Reviews recently posted…Love or Loathe: Love Triangles
Chrissi Reads20 January, 2014 at 9:32 pm
Aww Lucy. Just keep doing what you’re doing as blogging should never make you feel sad. You should be proud of everything you’ve achieved.
Chrissi Reads recently posted…Forbidden
Georgia20 January, 2014 at 10:21 pm
Aw, Lucy! *hugs* None of that is your fault at all. Don’t feel like you have to post, and don’t let page views get you down… Mine have been weirdly low this month, but my new year’s goal is to stop relying on them.
I love your YouTube channel and our blog, they’re awesome. Though I don’t comment every time, I still find time to read your new blog posts and I do love reading them. If school gets in the way though, or if you feel like reviewing is becoming a chore, don’t feel like you still have to blog! I’ve decided I’ll be taking a one, maybe two months long break later in the year, for my GCSE’s and my coursework and everything. I hate the idea of it but I’ve got to do it 🙁 I’ a bit reluctant to leave my blog, so I’m a little different, I guess.
Anyway, I’m going to carry on rambling if I don’t stop now 😉 so, I’m sending all the tea and the hugs and the book boyfriends to comfort you! 🙂 x
Zoe @ Bookhi20 January, 2014 at 10:23 pm
Of course we support you, Lucy! <3 I'm so sorry to hear that you've been going through a hard time. I completely understand and can empathise with you, there are times when I just want to curl up in a ball and cry to make everything go away. School is SO stressful, is is ridiculous how much pressure the teachers put on us.
Doing one post a week sounds like a geat idea. I really, REALLY hope your life becomes less stressful and blogging less makes it easier for you. I know how hard it can be; you're not alone<3 Blogging should never make you feel sad, it should be a hobby and there's no point doing it if it makes you depressed. But I'm so glad you're not leaving blogging forever 🙂 Your You Tube videos always make me smile and I love to read your posts however many you publish. Do what's best for you!
If you find your review pile too stressful, take a break from it for a few months. I didn't read any review books for a while last year because they were making me more stressed and I wasn't enjoying reading. Read what you want! If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm always here. *HUGS* <333
Zoe @ Bookhi recently posted…The Book Lover’s Survey Tag
Anne Booth20 January, 2014 at 10:29 pm
Dear Lucy. This is from the view point of a writer and a nearly 49 year old Mum of 4 teenagers. I really admire what you have done, and even if you take a break your really impressive achievement still stands and you can come back to it. I know from my own children how much pressure you are all under, and the important thing is to be wise enough (as you obviously are) to know when to take a break. It can be as long as you like. I know a writer who took a break from her blog for about a year – came back and is flourishing! You love books so much I am sure you will have no problem getting a job in publishing and/or writing your own books, and for that you need to be kind to yourself so that you can keep on top of all the LOADS of things school gives you to do (sorry if I sound irredeemably middle aged and mumsy!) I don’t know how you have managed to do so much already and am in awe – I have only managed a few posts on my blog and know I need to do more, and you are obviously full of talent and energy and have done loads. Don’t let worry about your blog bring you down – go back to it when you want to – but enjoy your unique life and good luck with all the other challenges of school. I had better stop before I start telling you to wrap up warm & have plenty of sleep – hope I don’t sound patronising as I really do admire you. I just think you sound very very tired and you need a rest to refresh yourself and you shouldn’t worry about that longterm AT ALL.
Alex :)20 January, 2014 at 11:09 pm
You are not alone my dear 🙂
Sometimes life and other things get in the way of blogging. Letting something get you down so much to extent that you get upset is not healthy and you have made the right decision what ever the outcome maybe.
I shut my first blog down because I couldn’t deal any more. Now on my new one I post a couple of times a week and it is so much better. I still have my old friends and I enjoy it more than ever! 🙂 <3
Good luck with everything! The community is here whenever you need it! 🙂 xoxox
Alex 🙂 recently posted…Joint Review: City of Fallen Angels and City of Lost Souls by Cassandra Clare
Francoise21 January, 2014 at 12:06 am
Don’t worry you’ll get through this stage and I think every blooger is feeling the pressure at the moment. Sunny and I have had many discussions about this and I just feel like blogging and reading are becoming a task. My review pile is growing larger as well so I understand you. I’m trying to put a band on myself from requesting.
I say just keep doing and try and not feel too obligated. If you have good followers they’ll follow you to the end (god that was cheesy…) but yes we will stick by you! Take as long as you need and just take a break and not focus on the bad things. Think positive! *cheers*
– Francoise @ My Crazy Bookish World
Francoise recently posted…Dash & Lily’s Book of Dares
Stephanie Tang21 January, 2014 at 1:17 am
Lucy, I completely understand. I went through the same experience about a month and a half ago. I’m in my last year of high school and for the first semester I was unbelievably busy with my college applications and trying to keep up with my schoolwork. I just didn’t have as much time to dedicate to reading and The Novlist as I would’ve liked, and blogging started to feel more like a job than a hobby to me. I took a step back and ultimately I decided that it wasn’t something I felt I could continue with. However, I wanted to maintain a voice in the blogging community, which is why I started a separate lifestyle blog which is awesome for me because I get to talk about all the varied things I’m interested in – which includes books, and it takes so much stress away because then I don’t feel obligated to talk about books I dislike either. I get to just spaz about the books I love, which is what I really wanted to begin with.
I hope that taking a step back will be as beneficial for you as it was for me. I don’t mean that I hope you come to the same conclusion that I did, but a bit of space can really help clarify things for you and help you figure out what it is that’ll make you happy.
Good luck with everything, and you can always tweet me if you want to talk more! I’m over at a different Twitter account now: @loveaugustblog
Stephanie Tang recently posted…Sunday Riley Effortless Breathable Tinted Primer
Nova @ Out of Time21 January, 2014 at 3:40 am
Lucy! We all love you. Do whats good for you because in the end it’ll be worth it.
I’m trying my best to keep up with the blogging, but it’s starting to get to me too. I’ve got major tests that I haven’t even studied for yet. It’s insane.
If you need a break, no biggie! just know that the community will be welcoming you with open arms <33
Nova @ Out of Time recently posted…Book Review: The Program – Suzanne Young
Rachel Hamilton21 January, 2014 at 8:03 am
I don’t think it hurts at all to take a break. At Book Walrus, we took 2-3 weeks off over Christmas and New Year and it was great. Visits dropped, naturally, but picked up again when we started again. Can you relieve some of the pressure with guest posts? From the look of all these wonderful comments, you’ve clearly got a lot of people who’d love to help! Be happy and enjoy blogging!
Rachel Hamilton recently posted…Contact
Anya21 January, 2014 at 10:16 am
Don’t worry about a thing Lucy, us loyal readers will still be here whether or not you post regularly. Cutting down on the books you receive will help (at least it helped me). I’m right round the corner from you and I’m always happy to help if you want to talk or hug it out 🙂
Maya21 January, 2014 at 10:39 am
Aw, Lucy 🙁 Don’t worry if you want to take a blogging break or whatever – we’ll all still be here when you get back. Cutting down on your posts sounds like a great idea if it will help you be less stressed, and we love your blogs no matter how frequently/infrequently they’re posted!
Even though I’ve only been blogging for a year and a half, the blogosphere does seem to me like it’s changed since then and I think the pressure gets to a lot of us. It’s become more competitive, and I know most of us worry about pageviews and comments and posting regularly, whereas a year ago I was thrilled to get my 30th follower!
I think cutting down on the books you accept to review is a great idea and it’s something I’m going to start doing too. Having the time to read your own books and library books, reread old favourites and explore new genres is fantastic and nothing restores your love of reading more.
Maya recently posted…REVIEW: Roomies
Eileen @ Singing and Reading in the Rain21 January, 2014 at 2:19 pm
Aww Lucy I’m sorry that you’ve been feeling this way! I totally know what you mean though, when I first started school this year I was so stressed out over what was going on and I just ended up freaking out most of the time. But don’t worry, I’ll still be here for you and I’m going to love all of your blog posts no matter how often they’re posted. I hope that you feel better soon and don’t worry because your page views will always bounce back up after you get comfortable again 🙂
Eileen @ Singing and Reading in the Rain recently posted…Uninvited by Sophie Jordan
Rita @ Weaving Pages21 January, 2014 at 4:32 pm
Aw, Lucy!! *hugs* Chin up! Don’t worry about a thing, because no one minds if you can’t post often on your blog- all we want is to be able to talk to your happy, fangirly self!
– Your blog should be something that makes you happy, not stressed and sad! If it’s doing that, go easy on yourself. Don’t look at page views, just write what you love, read what you love and talk about the things that you love.
– Now, as much as I love blogging, I have to say one thing: Put homework and school first. I would love to be writing my post on the TMI tag, and my review of Cinder, but unfortunately, I’m stuck revising Chemistry and doing a huge history project, so that’s going to have to wait for tomorrow. If you can’t have a post scheduled on time- it doesn’t matter! None of us are going to let you get away from our fangirling that easily!!
– Lastly, don’t let yourself worry for a second about your TBR pile. Think of it as a amazing opportunity to read more books than as a chore, and remind yourself that there is no clock ticking above your head, telling you to get through that pile of books quickly! Just take your time.
Sorry if my advice is kind of weird, but I think it’s the best I can give!! I hope you feel happier soon,
Rita @ Weaving Pages recently posted…Top Ten Things On My Reading Wishlist
Samantha Cartmel22 January, 2014 at 10:35 am
Everyone understands that it can all get a little too much at times. However, in terms of your book reviews, have you thought of getting another review blogger to review some of your pile and post only on your blog? I know I’d be interested in it.
Anyway, I hope you find time to have a break and get back into a swing which is more comfortable for you.
Emma Haughton23 January, 2014 at 10:08 pm
Lucy, One post a week sounds like plenty to me. Your happiness and education are the most important things. Try not to feel bad that you can’t do everything. Emma
Emma Haughton recently posted…Wish me luck
Rachel @ Booktastic Reviews24 January, 2014 at 12:16 pm
Don’t stress too much, it happens to the best of us. Remember I stopped blogging for a few months – had wrote a post to say how I just didn’t enjoy blogging and reading anymore so thought it’d be best to just call it a day on the whole blogging thing. But then, admittedly, a few months later, I rediscovered my love of reading and, eventually, missed blogging so much I regretted having ever stopped. So taking a step back from the book blogging world for a few months (even though I thought I would never return) ended up being the best thing I could do. I rediscovered a passion for reading and missed discussing all the books I read with other fangirls like myself. So, if you feel like your suffocating a little, take a break. We’ll all be here for you no matter what.
You could end up like me and rediscover your love for blogging.
Hope I helped some!<3
Rachel @ Booktastic Reviews recently posted…The Book Blogger TMI Tag!
Jaden (booklol16)24 January, 2014 at 5:59 pm
*clams* it the mid new year we are justed in Januray you can do it do ti give do not stop bloggging pppppppppppppppeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasllllllllllllllllllllle
Jaden (booklol16) recently posted…Book Blogging Problems
Kyra26 January, 2014 at 8:23 am
Aw Lucy! *gives lots of hugs and even more cupcakes* I completely understand how you feel! A few months ago I was so extremely stressed out with all my review books and posts and etc, and it also got me down. I think (and I must also listen to my own advice for a change) we must always remember we created a blog for fun, we review books because we love reading, if the joy completely goes away from blogging, we need to take a break if it’s stressing us. I’m really glad you wrote this post as a lot of book bloggers feel the same way and I think we can all support one another when we’re in a blogy/school-y/reading slump. Take all the time you need, and just remember to have fun! 🙂 <3
Kyra recently posted…Review – The House of Hades – Rick Riordan
Sarah @ A Geek's Bookshelf26 January, 2014 at 11:25 pm
This should be fun, so take the time you need until you feel it is fun again. I love reading your blog and I’m sure most of us will be here to read it whenever you feel like writing!
Around the Blogosphere #3 | Book Blogging30 January, 2014 at 12:05 am
[…] Lucy at Queen of Contemporary discussed her lack of enjoyment for blogging […]
Helen Grant3 February, 2014 at 11:09 am
Hi Lucy, so sorry you’re feeling so stressed out. Page views can be a real tyranny – I totally sympathise. I used to look at mine obsessively every day until spam messed up the figures and then it didn’t seem worth looking – and frankly it was a relief. I can’t add much to the good advice from various other people but one thing that might help is if people guest blogged for you? I see other book bloggers putting out requests for guest blogs or guest reviews when they are too busy because of exams, holidays, etc. Personally I am always happy to help in those situations and I am sure other people are, too. Plus I am sure everyone here would be glad to retweet links to your blog etc when you do post something, to help keep your following going even if you can’t blog as often. Look after yourself first! Relax and just read the stuff you really fancy. xx